


Dungi tu sahrafel?

by ForFucksSakeJim



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Accidental Confession, First Kiss, Kinda, Lost In Translations, M/M, Mind melds, Second Kiss, Spock Fucks Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-05-31
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:21:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24465601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForFucksSakeJim/pseuds/ForFucksSakeJim
Summary: Dungi tu sahrafel? Vulcan for "Will you trust me?" When the communicators are offline, Spock finds himself slipping more vulcan terms into his vernacular, too bad they come back online at the worst possible moment.----“Ashaya.” He began, his hand coming up to pinch his nose and stopped half way as he watched Jim’s eyes wide in shock.He was frozen in place as Jim spoke, “Computer. Repeat translation.”The automated voice, louder this time. Cementing the fact in stone that Spock had royally Fucked Up.“Ashaya; Ashyam. Vulcan. Darling, dear, beloved.” The voice beeped out and the two men were left in the heavy silence of the captain’s ready room.“Spock.” Jim spoke, not sure how to approach this new information.
Relationships: James T. Kirk/Spock
Comments: 17
Kudos: 191





	Dungi tu sahrafel?

**Author's Note:**

> this was inspired by a post on tumblr and it absolutely consumed my very being and at one point I spent just 5 hours down a rabbit hole of researching vulcan.

In Spock’s defense, he should never have begun speaking Vulcan aloud in the first place, but when the universal translators had been offline for a routine 24 hour maintenance, Spock had found himself slipping. 

He wasn't sure when the communicators had been reactivated, but he wished he had been aware of that before the conversation with Jim this morning. A routine debriefing between captain and first officer before a diplomatic landing mission. There had been a party two nights prior aboard the Enterprise where the diplomats met with various members of the crew and the federation delegates that were attending. 

A delegate from the planet itself has made his intentions quite known to the captain very early on that he was merely more than invested in other aspects than diplomacy. While the captain himself was not mandated to attend, the delegate had all but gave him an official invite to the proceedings and it would be rude and offensive to go back on his word. 

Spock tried very hard to control his raging emotion, but right now when his captain was being needlessly foolish and disregarding his duty to the ship.  _ Yes. The ship. _ That was what Spock kept telling himself anyways. But as the argument continued, he found his control slipping. “Captain, you are putting yourself at unnecessary risk. As your first officer, I cannot allow you to-”. He was cut off from the rest of his sentence. 

“I’m going, Spock! And that’s final!” He balled his fist and struggled to remain calm. It was futile. 

“ _ Ashaya _ .” He began, his hand coming up to pinch his nose and stopped half way as he watched Jim’s eyes wide in shock. 

He was frozen in place as Jim spoke, “Computer. Repeat translation.” 

The automated voice, louder this time. Cementing the fact in stone that Spock had royally Fucked Up. 

“ _ Ashaya; Ashyam _ . Vulcan. Darling, dear, beloved.” The voice beeped out and the two men were left in the heavy silence of the captain’s ready room. 

“Spock.” Jim spoke, not sure how to approach this new information. 

Spock spoke, “ _ Kaiidth _ .” Turning on his heel with a deadly precision, and stalking towards the door. Ignoring the computer as it translated the multiple meanings of one simple word to the captain. This was not happening. This was some sort of nightmare, Spock was certain. He just needed to wake up and- 

“Computer, lock door.” Jim commanded and Spock swore once more. This was not how he wanted this day to go.

“Captain, if I may be dismissed. I must meditate, it seems I am not in control of my emotions at the present moment.” He growled out, refusing to turn around and face him. He felt the vibrations of Jim’s footsteps as he walked closer to him and he wished nothing less of a red alert at this moment to distract them. 

“Spock.” Jim spoke again, his tone firmer as his hand reached out, hanging in the air for just a moment in hesitation before softly coming down on Spock’s shoulder. 

Spock relaxed slightly, Jim’s touch always a welcoming presence to him. He could feel the soft nudge directed at him from the contact, unknown to Jim that he was even brushing against the furthest reaches of his mind. A bright golden light that contrasted with his mind but at the same time, almost seemed to compliment it. And that fact scared Spock. 

“Look at me?” Jim asked and Spock obeyed. He would never deny any request from Jim, and this might very well be his last before he got discharged from his service for inappropriate behavior. 

Spock took a steadying breath before turning around, Jim’s eyes soft as he looked at the man in front of him. Spock would miss that most of all. Jim’s eyes were exquisite and he vowed to commit their unique color to memory. 

“I must apologize…” Spock began, “I have grown lax in speaking with you. Especially in the course of time that the translator was not operational. I will have my resignation letter sent to your PADD by tonight.” He had never understood the desire for the floor to open beneath one's feet, but he knew in this moment that he desired that scenario very much right now. 

“Spock, you have nothing to apologize for.” Jim spoke, his other hand coming up to Spock’s other shoulder. “There’s no need to submit a resignation letter, I would destroy all traces of it existing anyways.” Jim stifled a laugh and Spock opened his mouth to speak, but was cut off. “Yes, Spock, I know that’s a violation of Starfleet regulations and I wouldn’t care.” Spock closed his mouth. How was Jim so good at knowing what exactly he was going to say before he even got a word out? He supposed he would never know the answer to that. 

The two men were silent and Jim spoke, “Ashaya.” He repeated the word again, rolling the letters on his tongue in ways that sent a dark green blush across Spock’s face. 

“Captain-.” Spock began but once again Jim cut him off. It was growing infuriating. 

“For a race of no nonsense logic seekers, that sounds like a very illogical word.” He said. Spock sighed. 

“The Vulcan language is ancient and complex, Captain. A common misconception that we don’t feel emotion. The fact is we feel very deeply that it affects our very katra…” Spock drifted off, not quite sure where Jim was going with this. 

The shorter man was silent for a moment, and finally he spoke, “And what of your emotions about me?” He asked, his voice so quiet that for a moment Spock wondered if he spoke at all. 

“You told me once that Vulcans never lie.” He stated. 

“We do not.” Spock lied. 

“Have you ever lied to me?” He asked. 

“Never.” He lied again. He had lied to Jim before.  _ White lies. _ Is what his mother one told him. Little white lies that were never meant to harm a person but merely to protect them. Usually directed toward a child to shield them from the awful truths of the world. But neither him nor Jim were children. He vowed to never lie to Jim after this was over. 

Jim rephrased his question, “What do you feel for me?” A brave choice of words for the captain, but brash and blunt were the words he needed in this situation. There could be no room for human or Vulcan error on the context of what a word could mean. 

He answered the question, “What I feel for you is complex and ignites a fire within me. One that I have no knowledge on how to extinguish nor do I desire.” He spoke truthfully. 

Jim was quiet for a moment, “You know I never would lie to you, right Spock?” He asked. “Never to intentionally hurt you.” He added. 

“My mother often spoke of humans' tendency to lie, I often find myself not believing anybody, especially Mr. Chekov.” Jim laughed and Spock felt the flames grow higher. Jim’s laughter was an unexpected but quantifiable additive to the already smothering fire within him. 

“Your mother is right.” Jim replied, hesitating for a moment before stepping closer to Spock, their chests brushing against each other. 

“But you know how to tell I’m not lying, yes?” He asked, a closed question that told Spock that he already knew the answer to. There would be no use lying. 

“There are many studies in the observation of human body language that could accurately postulate-” Jim cut him off. 

“Meld with me.” He said. And Spock’s brain stopped. This...was not one of the outcomes that he could have predicted would come from the reveal of his true feelings towards his captain. Jim’s hands were still on his shoulders, slowly sliding down the length of his arms. A motion he had done many times in the past when Spock would find himself emotionally compromised. 

“Jim.” Spock spoke, a simple word that held so much power of him. 

The other man spoke, “I never want you to doubt any of the feelings I experience when you are with me.” His voice was soft, always so soft. Soft like the waves of the Voroth Sea where he spent part of his year. The waters, much like the presence of Jim’s mind, was warm and inviting, and he had to remind himself that he could not swim. Venturing too far in would only result in unwanted incidents.

“Melding is a very private and personal aspect of Vulcan culture.” Spock whispered. He didn’t know why he was whispering. Perhaps he feared if he dared to speak too loud he would shatter whatever tranquil state had been cast upon them. Here, in the dimly lit ready room with a view of one of the planet's four moons. Where there was no imminent danger to their persons and with no fear of being interrupted.

“I know.” Jim whispered back, and Spock felt his hand move on their own accord. Slowly touching the points of Jim’s face, their minds now closer than they had ever been before. 

“Are you sure, Captain?” Spock asked 

Jim breathed out a soft “yes.” and Spock exhaled. 

"My mind to your mind, my thoughts to your thoughts," and he felt himself fall within the waters of Jim’s mind and he found he could swim quite easily with Jim. 

His mind was brilliant and fascinating and so very illogical and Spock loved him more for it. The bright golden light that radiated from him as he looked at Jim. 

“I would never lie to you.” Jim repeated, and Spock could feel the truth in the words in the way they seeped into his veins. Like an indulgent piece of chocolate he would eat when his brain was most truly fried and meditation only scraped the surface. His limbs felt light and his heart pounded in his side so loudly he feared it would break out. He was calm as he gathered Jim closer in his arms, the versions of themselves bleeding between realms.

“What are you implying, Captain?” and Jim laughed, a melodic tone that carried in the vast openness of their minds and Spock pulsated as the wave of pure love washed over him like a tidal wave. 

“Spock, call me Jim.” He insisted and Spock would never deny anything from his ashaya. 

He repeated his question, “What are you implying,” he spoke “Jim.” and Jim smiled. 

“I love you, Spock.” The words rang true and Spock found himself at a loss for any human words he could string into a coherent sentence. 

  
Vulcan, on the other hand, he could do Vulcan. “Nenlohk dwon zeesh.” He spoke.

Jim laughed, “There’s no translators in my mind, Spock.” His arms wrapping around Spock’s neck to lean him down, “But I think I know what that means.” 

Spock smiled, his eyes growing soft as the meld slowly ended and they were back in the captain's ready room. Their bodies were as close as ever. 

Jim broke the silence first, “Say it again?” he asked, and who was Spock to deny him anything?

“Nenlohk dwon zeesh.” He repeated and the computer translated.  _ I love you.  _

And with the knowledge firmly planted in Jim’s mind he pulled Spock down gently and kissed him. His lips warm and Spock found he never knew what true bliss felt like until this very moment. Wrapped in the arms of the man before him, of the man who loved him, he found he never wanted this moment to end. To freeze this exact moment in time forever and live forever in the here and now. An illogical wish, but Spock found that he did not quite care. 

Jim pulled away all too soon and Spoc fought the urge to chase his lips and drown in him all over again. That could wait. They had forever. 

In Spock’s defense, he should have spoken more vulcan sooner, if only that it meant that they could share more kisses like this. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this train wreck of a fic  
> comments and kudos give me the will to live  
> come bother me on tumblr @ forfuckssakejim


End file.
